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It was a scene created for the voyeuristic eyes. This was no small town. It was in one of the metros. It was not even evening as if time would have changed the outcome.
Chirpy Priya, 28, was ready for festival time. Dressed in a western outfit she was looking great. Right now, she was bundle of nervousness. She did not know what she should do. Here life was normal till some 5 minutes back. Confident Priya has walked in on her heels and moved to the security check area at the entrance of the mall. There the security women found a very personal item in her purse. That was when everything changed.
It is different that the security woman had no business to probe any further. What she found was definitely was not a security risk. But then the guidelines said differently. Only prostitutes carry condom. Poor Priya, she further complicated the issue by telling the security woman that she has to meet her client at the bar. And the word Client in this context made everyone’s antenna go up.
In the same mall at the top floor, another scene was taking place. Albert known for wearing his heart on his sleeve was with friends. Everyone knew that smart Albert carried a condom in his wallet. And definitely when he was out with friends or it was an outstation trip. His friends called him ‘dude’. Albert was always ready for possibilities.
While he was at the food court counter searching for some notes to pay for the pizza, his wallet slipped out of his hand. His predominantly female team was with him. They were in fact surrounding him as each one of them in their own way wanted to order the toppings personally.
Perfectly following the Murphy’s Law, wallet landed at such an angle that the poor condom slipped out. Now it was out in the open. Naughty picture of Miss Oomph staring from the floor. Everyone including the girls in his team saw it and they smiled. He searched to see if any smile had some purpose. It was OKAY. Albert was a male. Finding condom with him was natural.
The reactions were different. There was Priya being scandalised and here was Albert with a thumbs up.
Our culture fails to accept this information. It is not part of natural pattern. Woman and condom don’t go well. At least socially.
Carrying a condom is far worse a sin than wearing short skirts, drinking, late night working and being in male company. Society is fast in stereotyping. Condom is like complete evidence. There is no escape.
We have evolved or so we will like to believe. Yet, we firmly hold to our out-dated expectations. In a relationship it is the male who should initiate sex. It is a males right to have pleasure and his responsibility to ensure protection. So, we fail to accept that women may also seek pleasure. We can never digest the idea of a woman taking a leading role in ensuring protection in her relationship.
What’s wrong? Why should they be branded differently?
Honestly we have treated sex and any other related subject as a no-talk zone. We have been corrupting sons of this land and strangulating the daughters of this country with our biased and out-dated outlook.
No solution is visible in near horizon.
A woman with condom equals prostitute. This thought is imprinted. It is here to stay for long. The people in ‘The land of Kamsutra’ are regressive when it comes to sex, love and pleasure. Not that they need to be three different things. We are a long time away from recognising our problems. We fail to see that women can also make the decision regarding their pleasure and protection.
I am sure it will be long before such blatant stereotyping of women will stop. We are a long time away from a situation where women will have the complete freedom and right to define and choose what they do? Can media play a constructive role in accelerating the process.
